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a journey not to be forgotten. ♥

Saturday, August 06, 2005
无奈者 posted at 10:11 PM

I recalled Mr Yue sharing this story with us.. about this hole in the street.. strong-willed ppl will choose to avoid it.. aimless people will drop into it without knowing.. only those who think they know what they are doing but actually they are not will drop into the hole willingly.. that's me..
Somehow, not sure since when I have fallen into this black hole knowingly and willingly.. in the hole, I think I am happy at first.. I got ppl who shares my interests.. we have countless topics to talk about.. we seem to be living in a world of our own.. I am contented.. really.. I don't care about ppl's comments as long as I am happy.. but I realised I am wrong.. I cannot do things my way.. it is impossible to do that in this world.. whether it is at sch or work.. as days go by, we just didn't realise the fact that we seem to be living our lives in vain.. we are not moving on with life at all.. when everyone seems to be moving on whether at a fast speed or not, at least they are moving.. I feel that I am not.. I am just there in the black hole.. going round in circles..I need to get myself out of that hole fast.. cos I know I have got no time to lose.. I don't know how determined am I in getting out of the hole but I know I must try..
I have think it thorough and though.. since young, I have not been a problem to teachers.. not in pri sch and sec sch.. I guess I am not used to being the problematic kid of the class.. I do not even want to be..so when this incident happens, I am really sad.. I did not expect this to happen to me.. but it is really my fault.. I have really projected the wrong image from day 1.. I can't have anyone to blame.. and my attitude in life hate to say but it sux.. really.. In the past, I have been too self-centred.. thinking I can do away with ppl's comments and opinions abt me.. but now then I realised I can't.. their opinions matters.. as a result of my bad attitude, I have become irresponsible.. I tend to give excuses to defend myself when I am really in the wrong.. I feel like I am the baddy of the world.. I am the worse person on Earth..really.. and I feel that I have disappointed my close peers.. all those who had known me long and well enough..so the 1st thing to do is to change my attitude towards life cos attitude really does matter..
Frm this min onwards.. a brand new me is in the making.. watch out for the new me..
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